Far Out Techno-Creepy Wonders in the Waning Years of the Anthropocene
Skynet in Tel Aviv
While the U.S. military has placed most of its terminator eggs in one basket — the unmanned aerial drone basket — the state of Israel seems to be really branching out. Thinking outside of the killer-flying-robot box, Israeli military employs unmanned vehicles by air, land, water and subterranean tunnels. Yuval Azulai, a defense analyst at the Institute for National Security Studies in Tel Aviv predicted earlier this year that, by 2035, Israel will be able to “plan almost any military operation using autonomous unmanned devices; it will be possible to carry out most military operations using such devices; and unmanned devices will operate in swarms. In other words, hundreds of devices, of different kinds, will communicate with one another in real time, will react to the changing reality, and will attain the desired outcome on the battlefield, with no human presence on the scene.” Of course, Azulai means no Israeli human presence or else he means Palestinians are not humans.
And while Israel is a leading producer, user and seller of military grade aerial drones, flying robots are so 2013. Let’s meet a few of Israel’s deadly non-aerial robots currently in use.
Guardium
Guardium is an unmanned ground vehicle – placed in the field for the first time in 2009 – that drives itself up and down the Gaza and Lebanese borders. Guardium is kind of like the love-child of a golf cart, a tank and a xenophobic border patrol agent. Covered in armor and decked out with the latest suite of sensors and surveillance gear, it has replaced the presence of human soldiers walking the border beat.
Protector USV
A significant portion of Israel’s naval fleet is comprised of unmanned speed boats strapped with a grab bag of weapons: .50 caliber machine gun, 7.62 mm machine gun, 40 mm grenade launcher.
MTGR 
An MTGR (Micro Tactical Ground Robot) is a creepy crawler. Israel’s 16 pound version is used as a kind of tunnel rat to enter the complex of tunnels Hamas and other Palestinian groups have created in, under and around the border with Israel. They have camera’s with 360 degree views, day and night capabilities, one or more robotic arms, GPS, a laser rangefinder to measure dimension, large batteries and decent speed capabilities. An MTGR can place explosives and remove booby traps.
Robots Use Wifi to See Through Walls
Robots created at the University of California are now able to see through walls using Wi-Fi signals. Working a a team, a pair of robots has successfully produced accurate maps of the items inside of a solid structure by exploiting the differences in transmitted and received Wi-Fi signal strengths. This means, if they wanted to, they could find you hiding in your closet using the same signal they are watching Youtube on.
Jibo, the Family Robot That Will Probably Not Kill You
Folks, its inevitable, most of the one’s you love, your friends and family, will have a Jibo robot, or some cheap knockoff or fancy upgrade, in the next few years. You are going to find yourself surrounded by these:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3N1Q8oFpX1Y
Be sure to stay tuned for Part VIII of the Early History of the Robot Wars and check out Part I and Part II and Part III and Part IV and Part V and Part VI to catch up on twitter controlled cyborgs, sext messages in your eyeballs and other totally true techno-creepy shit.